Then Peter came to him and asked, “Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?” “No, not seven times,” Jesus replied, “but seventy times seven!” Matt 18:21-22
What is forgiveness? The biblical definition of forgiveness is:
Forgiveness: (Strong’s G836) to leave, forsake, let alone!
Forgiveness is something Jesus commands you to do! However, forgiveness is NOT reconciliation. Sometimes we do not want to forgive because we think it means we have to be reconciled to the person who hurt us. Or we don’t want to forgive because that means the person will get away with what they have done. Forgiving a person from your heart gets rid of the toxicity inside of you! It removes the blockage so you can be healed of the pain.
If a person repeatedly exhibits poor behavior, the Bible tells you to stay away from them! Here are a couple of New Testament scriptures WARNING you to STAY AWAY from people with ungodly behavior:
A good tree can’t produce bad fruit, and a bad tree can’t produce good fruit. So every tree that does not produce good fruit is chopped down and thrown into the fire. Yes, just as you can identify a tree by its fruit, so you can identify people by their actions.Matt 7:18
Don’t be fooled by those who say such things, for “bad company corrupts good character.” Think carefully about what is right, and stop sinning. 1 Corinthians 15:34
Read what the Apostle Paul sayin the New Testament about Christians with bad behavior:
When I wrote to you before, I told you not to associate with people who indulge in sexual sin. But I wasn’t talking about unbelievers who indulge in sexual sin, or are greedy, or cheat people, or worship idols. You would have to leave this world to avoid people like that. I meant that you are not to associate with anyone who claims to be a Christian, yet indulges in sexual sin or is greedy, or worships idols or is abusive, or is a drunkard, or cheats people. Don’t even eat with such people. It isn’t my responsibility to judge outsiders, but it certainly is your responsibility to judge those inside the church who are sinning. God will judge those on the outside; but as the Scriptures say, “You must remove the evil person from among you.” 1 Corinthians 5
There are scriptures all through the Bible telling you to STAY AWAY from people with bad behavior! Apostle Paul tells you to REMOVE anybody who is Christian (or claims to be) out of your life if they are involved in certain sins (read 1 Corinthians 5 above). If you disobey, and keep these bad people in your life, then their bad behavior will continue to effect you. When Jesus tells you to forgive, that did not mean continue to enable someone else’s bad behavior!
Read carefully the words of Jesus Christ:
If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins. Matthew 6:14
I definitely want to be forgiven of my sins! Nobody else’s poor choice should keep me from having my sins forgiven!
In my early 20’s when I was praying for God to send me a husband, I had a lot of unforgiveness toward men. My biological father was an adulterer, cheat, thief and all out irresponsible father. My step dad was physically and verbally abusive. My ex husband committed adultery, lied, stole, was a drunk and a horrible husband! Furthermore, a couple of boyfriends before that had broken my heart. I harbored unforgiveness toward the male gender! I wanted a good Godly husband but I had a hard time in relationships because I did not trust any men! Hard to have a good relationship with a man if you think most men are evil.
One day I was talking to a male friend of mine about my disdain toward men. He looked at me and apologized, saying he used to be a womanizer before he knew Christ. He asked if he could pray for me and said I needed to forgive men. He prayed and I confessed to God I needed help forgiving men! After the prayer, it felt like a HUGE weight was removed! I sensed a supernatural love in my heart! Shortly after that, God sent me the man I am currently married to!
The Bible says we can come boldly before the throne of Grace to obtain mercy and grace in our time of need (Heb 4:16)! Instead of trying to forgive in your own strength, I recommend you ask God for HIS grace to truly forgive!
PRAYER:
Heavenly Father, I come boldly before your throne of mercy and grace in the name of your son Jesus Christ. I ask for your abundant grace to truly forgive those who have hurt me. In particular I lift up (name those you need to forgive) to you. I choose to forgive them. Heavenly Father please forgive me of all of my sins and wash them with away with the blood of Jesus Christ. Please fill me with your Holy Spirit. Amen!